Friday, May 29, 2009

4 hours

Christina, Me and Katie will be picking up Patti in just 4 hours. . .. . . . . looking forward to it. the last post showed you how overwhelming things have been, and it is up to me to make a conscious effort to not let it rule my emotions and mood!!! being upset will not change Bill's family, so the only think i can change or control is my reaction to them. being upset is not going to make the strike go any faster, so i have to make sure i do not dwell on that. I just experienced a Miracle seeing the hands of a doctor change the future of my son. I have this awesome daughter who walked into the house today and handed me an envelop ( mom, you and bill take this weeks pay check, i don't need it, i'll just buy "silly" things anyway. yeah i'll be the first one to say she can be an opinionated spoiled little snot at times~ but when it counts, she is always there to help out in a tough situation. my youngest Sammy, hasn't left Drew's side, he stayed awake with him all night, so he wouldn't have to be alone, doing errand for him and such. and Corey and Sam both had the house ready for Drew...... reclining chair in place, side tables, etc.... I came home grumpy yesterday..... and instead of being happy with what was done, i pouted cause it wasn't done perfect. I cried last night....... cause i needed too..... today i feel so much better...... God WILL take care of my needs, and He will make sure i remember what i have......... not worry about what i don't have...... cause when it is said and done........ I have these AWESOME CHILDREN!!!, and this wonderful husband..... and the absolute greatest friends...... I have a view of the sunrise in the morning. I have this amazing body that can hike 5 miles, this strong body, that continues to heal as i am on this journey to better health..... I have a friend that is traveling from Arizona to sit on my porch with me, I have a Sister that lives 1/2 a mile from me...that is there for EVERYTHING, gee i could go on and on........ and i gotta get going.
I still got a long way to go to find the balance of peace in my soul... but for now i am happy.......now i may begin the worry thoughts again tonight before i drift off to sleep, but maybe not........ i think I'll just love the NOW and let God worry about the TOMORROW.

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