Thursday, June 25, 2009

Soaring with the Eagles today, not tomorrow

For years now I’ve been saying, tomorrow I will do this, tomorrow I will do that. Tomorrow when I am thinner I will try this. I’ve been morbidly obese for almost 20 years. I was angry because I figured the fat on my body was weighing down my Spirit, my Spirit that was aching to soar with the Eagles, was attached to this very heavy form of a human body.
I tried every diet out there, tried every exercise machine that enticed me at 2 in the morning while watching endless magical Infomercials. I wanted to lose weight before a vacation, before my class reunion, before a million other events in my life. I wanted to lose weight to make my X husband jealous, I wanted to lose weight to keep my X husband from leaving, and I wanted to lose weight so I didn’t embarrass my children.
So after 20 years of this, and although I’d lose a few pounds, I just found myself getting heavier and heavier. I knew that I needed to make a drastic change in my life. I’m not talking about changing my eating habits, I am not talking about increasing my exercise. I am talking about something deeper than what the human eye can see, Deeper than just skimming the surface of a deep blue ocean. I needed to dig down deep into the core of my being. My first and biggest mile in this awesome journey was to accept Me for the wonderful person that I am, all 300+ pounds of me. It was during time of great meditation and Prayer that the profound truth came to me, the truth that has forever altered my direction in life. My Spirit is weightless, Nothing physical can weigh it down. Therefore, I Can soar with the Eagles today, I don’t have to wait until tomorrow.
Where am I now since that wonderful discovery was made over a year ago? Lets see, I probably weigh 100 lbs less. I enjoy hiking and weight training. I have a job where I know that I am supposed to be at. The world can be crumbling around me, and no matter what boggles my body and my mind down……. My Spirit is soaring high above the wind, and it can’t be touched.
Where am I going to be tomorrow? Don’t really care. I am enjoying the today. Sure I need to lose more weight, and I probably will, But I have my lifetime to do it. I think I will just enjoy this wonderfully unique journey I call my life.

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